so if when you are writing a blog?

Oh i see, when you're writing a blog, but now that I'm writing I can dictate, that makes absolutely no sense, except in the in that kind of alternate world we used to believe in some ofoh  when you're writing a blog, but now that I'm writing I can dictate, that makes absolutely no sense, except in the in that kind of alternate world we used to believe in some of

Well, that's very ridiculous because either you believe in it or you don't believe in it, and I believe in dictation because it seems to be that you just think and then it gets on the page for us when you're typing it's a great effort to make your fingers work to listen to your mind, now that sounds like Priest listening to your mind and actually when you're reading proves you feel more intelligent I'm sure that's true and let me ask Michele Cone and my other friends if it's true when you're reading first in French because I think I spent a year reading first was it in French or English? I can't remember but when your reading proves to be Proust here it meanst PR 0USt. No one  has ever had such an impression on so many people as Proust but have survival but that's something else indeed, andProust is so everywhere and everything and always. I know he was a real person and that sort of stands in the way but it shouldn't maybe now I think I'll go have a drink and say goodbye right now for dictating but why is it fun? It's fun dictating more fun than just typing. OK goodbye for now also has ever had such an impression on so many people asProust . He is so everywhere and everything and always. I know he was a real person and that sort of stands in the way but it shouldn't maybe now I think I'll go have a drink and say goodbye right now for dictating but why is it fun? It's fun dictating more fun than just typing. OK goodbye for now.

what fun!

 OK when you're writing a blog, can you dictate? Because obviously, if you don't feel you have a lot of time and yet now that I'm 91 and not not teaching or anything I have lots of time except it doesn't feel like it then I could really expand on whatever I want to talk about. Really interesting that nobody will be reading it because I haven't done a blog for what five years six years seven years I don't have no idea but not the case. Now I'm dictating this and I will simply be happy to have it somewhere because otherwise everything is lost. No when I have to start dictating again because it gives out of space or time or some thing and I know we all get out of space and time and everything in any case but how do I file to be able to dictate and not have to type and type and type because my fingers are clumsy, and I am clumsy and all that kind of thing but how amazing to be able to dictate

So what I've been thinking about is what I want to preserve, and I raised for me in my memory and today I was thinking about preserving all the wonderful things I'll be losing when I lose various people wh I'm leaving because she has somewhere else to go and I guess I'll have someone else helping me but it's been such a delight to see the same face over and over. And at my age it's very comforting to see the same faces over and over and a funny thing well there lots of funny things but this funny thing is interesting I think next-door is someone very delightful whose name is Lita and somehow she brings tulips and such things and then sometimes comes for a drink but probably doesn't enjoy it much otherwise she would come more often I expect but in any case it's wonderful having somebody next-door and then somebody down the hall.

It's funny when you s dictation and you don't go on with it and then it thinks you're going on and you have it going on, but what I really wanted to think about was a lot of things in my past that I don't want to lose, and the only way not to lose them I suppose is to write them down.

but I've got to think but I didn't want to lose and I guess that's just about everything except a terrible mistake. I made once in my life and it was so terrible. I never got over it, and the world changed for me entirely many many years ago when I was so happily married to Peter, the British guy I loved, and then somehow for some ridiculous reason I went off.

It doesn't really make a new paragraph but, washing it it's not it's not a machine it's a dictating thing forever kind of thing that is so I should really go down to the gym and do some exercises but I actually hate going to the gym and I hate doing exercises and I much prefer just sitting here and writing some thing or not writing something and maybe having a glass of something but actually I should wait to see if the groceries are coming because I ordered groceries I think, and if nothing comes then that will mean that I  my noggin my noggin.

Me think who Me think who write blogs for absolutely no idea, and I don't know if anyone will have a read this but nanny case I will feel better about not losing absolutely everything every day, because I tend to do that, and maybe if I wrote things down, I wouldn't lose them because writing for me it's just like living and therefore I don't feel any suspicion of wasting time about it or anything like that.

how odd

 Today, after not writing anything but grocery order -- how massively exciting: two kinds of lettuce, watermelon cubes, weiners (if that's the way you/we/one spells it), and the very beloved (by me) taramosalata and types of cookies, about which I am most wild -- I seem to have misplaced not just what I was writing but the very idea of what I might have been writing about.

Well, at least I didn't say "penning"! I may be affected in some ways (don't know which, so I hope I'm not) but not in writing and we (I) notice I didn't say my manuscripts!! Can you imagine saying that about your own letters or reviews or whatever you write? Now I'm going to see if I can dictate this well, obviously I can dictate it, but did the thoughts come out the same way if you're talking or writing ? I do like to write and actually feel more like me writing, very often, than being now, that sounds ridiculous, imagine, thinking of being. It says you're using  too splendiferous or  enormous a word.

I should be able to write a short story no, I'd love to be able to write a short story, but I don't think I'm very good at plots, and I can't write poetry because I know I'm not very good at it. When I was young, I used to think I could try it, may be poems in prose. Long ago  had a conversation. or discussion (if there's a difference) with a very deservedly famous Columbia professor Michael Riffaterre  about that issue. Extraordinarily, everything with him became an issue, and I suspect that that's because he enjoyed issues. Whatever they were. I guess he was on the non-liberal side of politics, as of Education, but strangely, when I was having a very difficult time with life and divorce, it was Michael who walked with me on the beach, and somehow made me feel all right about life.

I should go and read the paper because I haven't started at all well today, but I did want to see if I could write, and I guess I found out I could, sort of.

Importance

 Now it seems impossible not to notice the rushing by of time and all the same, the importance of taking all the moments we need to keep up our friendships: the other night, at Korali, the super Greek restaurant near me, gloriously situated up just one block so I can roll my way to it,  we were four, friends from long ago and not so very long ago. All doing different things,  in relatively different fields and New York places uptown and in the village (with others slotted in, Uganda, and Connecticut  for instance),  but something about a four-way conversation feels so terrifically and happily unlike a chat among three or a dialogue with two,  or, as must often happen, a monologue of one. 

Ann Gellen

 I cannot remember if I wrote about the amazing Ann Gellen, whose studio I visited, having read about her and Polina Berlin's Gallery, and then seen Her Constructions!. Remarkable, and I would LOVE to have them on film somehow!

Margaret Fuller!

 How could we have forgotten Margaret Fuller, and her everything lost, like her "u recoverable manuscript!
Just read Mollie Barnes' "Margaret Fuller's Illegibilities : afterlives of an unreadable, unrecoverable  manuscript" in College Literature: A Journal of Critical Literary Studies, pp.116-145. Amazing story, wonderful writing. 

Hard thing, growing old, and my husband, the wonderful and courageous Boyce Bennett, a retired pathologist as I say every time, not knowing who ever has read anything, is having a hard time. OOOOF. 

no sodium!!!! and Peter Schjedahl , Frank O'Hara, and more

Yes, but not much more! Just told by a visiting nurse yesterday that my husband, just out of the hospital (a nightmare, he says) should. have no sodium, and taking a look at our Progresso Soups and the like, she was categorically in favour of our ridding out pantry and kitchen (well, the same small opening chez nous) of all heavy in sodium products. And she was very convincing (I am easily convinced about things in general, perhaps not always specifically.) so we are ordering things for Boyce my husband like saltines without salted tops!!!!

Those super-delicious Xochitl crackers anew but unsalted (we southerners are very prone to salt!)

Fortunately, Taramosalata, to which we are mildly addicted, comes regular and Light! probably spelled lite, but same thing, different taste. Less oomph, as is true of most unsalted items. Will take getting used to!

Unflagging is/are my recent adoration (s)of Eileen Gray, how not, and anything written by Peter Schjedahl and Christopher Benfey and Brian Dillon, all items by each,  like Peter S's "Hot, Cold, Heavy, Light,, 100 Art WRrtings 1988-2018 and The Hydrogen Jukebox: Selected Writings of Peter Schjeldahl 1978-1990-

and Of course I read Peter S's daughters book: Ada Calhoun's Also a Poet: Frank O'Hara,  my Father,, and Me.Whew!. 

About Frank O'Hara:: How I loved the LunchTime Room in the Modern! I remember asking for the room and the guard saying "Lunch Time" and my assuming she meant it was Time for  her Lunch.